Teen Mom Interview - 1

 Teen Pregnancy/Motherhood Interview

I've been wanting to interview other teen moms to post on my blog to give a little insight on what it's really like. Since I know a few other moms in real life who got pregnant as teenagers, I hope to get a few interviews from them but figured it might be helpful and encouraging for others to step up if I interviewed myself first. 

Cole's Teen Pregnancy Interview

Pregnancy to Teen Mom

How old were you when you found out you were pregnant?

I had just turned 17 when I found out I was pregnant.

What was your initial reaction?

I was really, really shocked! They weren't kidding in health class when they said you could get pregnant your first time. 

In all honesty, my first reaction was to terminate my pregnancy. I wasn’t ready to be a parent. I felt as if I could barely take care of myself let alone a baby who would be completely dependent on me for everything.

How did your baby’s father react?

My boyfriend had the same reaction I did. He wasn’t ready to be a dad, just like I wasn’t ready to become a mom. He supported every decision I made though, even after I decided to keep our baby.

What made you decide to go through with having a baby?

Honestly, it wasn’t until I saw the ultrasound that I chose not to get an abortion. I think that’s when I realized that there was a little person inside of me, and that little person was my baby and I didn’t want anyone to ever hurt her.

How did your friends and family react?

Nick and I didn’t tell anyone other than our two best friends about our pregnancy for the first five months. At that point there was no way I was going to able to hide an enormous pregnant belly, especially as the months got warmer and I had to start dressing in tank tops and shorts. 

At five months pregnant though, everyone had suspicions. I had quit partying, smoking and hanging out all of a sudden with no real reasons as to why. My parents obviously noticed these things, too. Then there was the big weight gain, mostly in my stomach area, and my eating had increased a lot, too.

When Nick and I finally decided to tell people mostly everyone was excited. My mom took me maternity clothes shopping. I honestly thought my mom and dad would be furious, but they were very supportive.

What steps did you take to prepare for motherhood?
 
Nick got a fulltime job that made really good money so he could financially support the three of us. We bought a car, and made sure to have all of the materialistic things needed to raise a baby; crib, blankets, bottles, etc. My friends and family members bought us a ton of stuff for our baby shower. Honestly, we didn’t even have to buy much. We were incredibly lucky.

The biggest thing was mentally preparing myself. I had never really been around babies or children before. I had no idea what I was doing, so I just dove headfirst into a ton of pregnancy and parenting books, especially What to Expect When You're Expecting . I watched movies and television shows, but those mostly just scared me. I talked to my mom a lot about what to expect, and went to a couple appointments at the hospital to set up everything. And of course I always made to see my doctor regularly. I used to get my Grandma to drive me to my appointments before I told anyone I was pregnant. I told her it was for counseling.

When you were pregnant, did you notice that people treated you differently because you were young?

There were a few nurses at the hospital that were really rude. I did notice a lot of stares from people on the streets, but no one ever said anything. While finishing my last semester at school I was able to hide my growing stomach under baggy sweaters, so I didn't have to deal with classmates saying anything. If anyone had noticed, or had an opinion on my early pregnancy, they never said anything to my face. 

How did becoming a teen mom affect your life?

Becoming a mom would change anyone’s life dramatically. The biggest thing though was not having my own place to live, or a high school diploma. Those things made me feel bad, and so I forced myself to become a much more responsible person. I rarely went out with friends, became a much more clean and organized person, and for the first time in years I had goals that I wanted to achieve like becoming healthier and looking into careers.

Did you have to take time off of school or were you able to graduate high school on time?

I did drop out senior year because I wanted to be home with my baby to raise her. Through correspondents and then later an adult learning center I was able to get all of my high school credits and graduate.

What was the hardest part of being a teen mom?

Having to give up a lot of my spare time. I wasn’t used to being so selfless, but I quickly got used to my new mommy routine. I missed seeing my friends a lot, and not getting out as much. Being a mom can also be very mentally and physically draining, too. I had never felt so busy in my life.

What are your plans for the future?

I’m in the process of applying to college right now. I want to go to school for journalism and become a fulltime writer. We’re trying to pay off our credit card debt, and save for our own apartment or house right now, too. Mostly, I just want to be able to provide everything Sidney needs to be a happy and healthy child. 

There it is, my interview with myself. 

If you were a teen mom and would like to answer the same questions feel free to contact me. You can send me a picture and I can link the interview back to your website/blog if you want. Or if you would prefer to stay anonymous that's fine, too.

The point of these simple interviews is to help give people an honest perspective of teen moms and hopefully erase some of the stereotypes us teen moms get thrown into. 

Thanks, 

Mixed Emotions That Come With Pregnancy

Gigantic Pregnant Belly!

I felt like writing this post because I think that pregnancy can be an interesting topic, and although my pregnancy was back in 2007 I still remember it quite clearly (and maybe my journals helped with my memory a bit).

Anyway…

 

Nine months of pregnancy can seem like a lifetime while it’s happening. 

It can be the most difficult nine months of your life (so far). There’s a rollercoaster of emotions that comes with pregnancy. You’re excited yet terrified. Then you’re happy but sad. You feel ecstatic and at the same time devastated. Or at least I went through all of that, but that might of had something to do with being a teen girl who never planned on having a baby or a husband.

Does anyone ever actually plan on having children? Okay, there are probably a lot of people who do, but I know for a fact that there are also a ton of people who didn’t. 

 

I for one did not plan on having a child.

Well, I was 17 at the time and who really plans on getting pregnant at 17? Not many people around here.

If I didn’t “accidentally” get pregnant I don’t think I would have ever chose to have a child. I was never fond of children. Now I know that I would have missed out on a lot of wonderful things if life had it worked out that way. (You can read more about this here).

Finding out you’re pregnant unexpectedly can be one of the most terrifying feelings. Ever watch the movie Knocked Up? Guaranteed everyone’s experience is different, but sometimes our reactions and feelings can be very similar. 

When I first became pregnant it was like some how I just knew.

Or maybe I was just super paranoid. Well, the first sign was that my stomach felt weird. I felt queasy often, but not in a flu-like way, just a little nauseous now and then. After I missed my period I started to panic, but I kept my cool by reminding myself that I was still very irregular. Two weeks, still no period; I bought a pregnancy test. I still remember that day very well. I asked my mom for money so Nick and I could shop at Value Village, and then we walked across the street to Shoppers Drug Mart to purchase my first and only pregnancy test.

That pink cross felt like a nightmare, a curse, like I was being punished for all the bad things I had ever done. I just wanted to crumple up into a ball and disappear. I felt like my life was over. Morning sickness didn't help me feel any better, either.

I thought to myself, there goes “the best days of my life.” 

No more high school parties, no crazy college experiences or partying in my early twenties at the bar.

Alright, all that didn’t sink in until farther along (and looking back, I haven‘t missed out on anything). My initial reaction was to terminate my pregnancy, but you can’t book your appointment until after you’ve gotten an ultrasound.

So that’s what I did. I refused to go through my family doctor in case he ever mentioned something to my mom or dad and ended up going into a walk-in clinic.

It was love at first site. 

It was at that moment I decided there was no way I could go through with it. One glimpse at the ultrasound and the flicker of her heart beat forced me into motherhood.

I was terrified to tell Nick I wanted to keep our baby. We had just started dating, but I knew I had to tell him sooner or later. I made it clear to him that having the baby was all my choice and I didn’t care if he stuck around or not (although I secretly hoped he would). And obviously he did because 6 years later here we are.

There are times I think to myself, “If only Sidney came after college.” That way I could have had an easier time raising her; having an education, maybe some money and a job, but it didn’t work out that way. 

I believe things have worked out for the best.

Did you plan your first pregnancy? What was your initial reaction?

Thanks,
Cole