Friday, April 5, 2013

Do You Dare to Dream?

Life's Unexpected Moments




Life doesn’t always work out how we expect it to. Sometimes we end up in places without knowing how we got there or why we were lead there. At times it can seem completely unfair as if you’re the unluckiest person alive, but there are times when you will feel the opposite and wonder how you ever got so lucky.

I have had days, months and even years where I stopped to reflect on my life and wondered those same things. Why did this happen to me? What did I do to deserve this? It can be extremely depressing, but then again, it can be extremely uplifting.

The one thing I do know is that no matter how difficult things are, or how awful things feel, it never lasts forever and most likely I come out stronger, wiser and a better person because of it.

When I got pregnant at 16 I thought that my life was over. In my mind I would have to give up every dream I had to support this child. That my life’s purpose was only to care for this little human being that was beginning to grow inside of me.

From that moment on every decision I made was made with my daughter’s needs as my top priority.

She needed a healthy mom, I became healthy
She needed an educated mom, I made sure I graduated
She needed material things, I made sure I could afford those things.

I thought, “It doesn’t matter what I want anymore because the only thing I truly want now is for my daughter to grow up happy and healthy.”

It took me a long time to realize that I could still dream, and pursue the things I wanted, and by doing that I was being an even better mom.

For the first couple years of my daughter’s life I never considered that I could have a career as a writer or an artist, because in my mind that wouldn’t make me enough money. I thought the best way to make sure she had a good life was for me to suck it up and find a 9-5 job that paid decent whether I enjoyed it or not.

And do you know what happened?

I burnt myself out.

I became so depressed that I quit my job, moved out of my apartment and back home with my mom and decided to rethink my life. I was just that unhappy.

It’s been almost two years now since that mental breakdown and I’m still in the process of working towards my dream, but at least now I recognize that I’m allowed to have one and I know what I want to do in life.

I want to write, I want to take pictures, I want to be creative and I want to own my own business. These are things that I want. Just for me. It isn’t going to happen overnight, nothing ever really does, but working towards it is half the fun! Learning new things, meeting new people, having new experiences.

Now my family and I are facing another challenge - getting our mortgage caught up. It’s terrifying and needless to say it’s been causing me a lot of stress and anxiety, but no matter what the outcome is somehow we will make it through this. What other choice do we have?

Life sure can be scary at times, but what the heck, might as well enjoy it!

What are some of your dreams?

Thanks,

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6 comments:

  1. You have made it through some tough situations, you will get through this one too! I have a dream to start my own business but it's slow going and it's hard to keep a positive outlook. Your post is really inspiring!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you :)

      Starting a business is hard work, but at least you're working for yourself, which in my opinion is always the best option. What kind of business do you have?

      Delete
  2. I couldn't agree more with everything you've said here. I feel the same way and am here for you!
    ♥Emma Deer

    ReplyDelete
  3. My mantra when times get tough is that "it is what it is" and I can either "choose joy" or choose to be miserable. Things (at times) may suck...but realizing that you are going to do what and all that you can... and STILL BE HAPPY is really a choice. :)

    keep on keepin' on! :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you :)

      I agree 100%, you don't always have full control over certain circumstances but at least you can try to make the best of it.

      Delete

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