Any time a big life changing event happens to me (like breaking up with someone), I often do a lot of reflecting.
This is probably one of the biggest changes I have experienced. Within a week I started college, and have become a single parent living on my own! That's a lot to take in. But I noticed that being in school has helped me to feel hopeful, inspired and even distracted enough to get through the day.
As I looked around my emptier apartment after dinner I started to feel sad, and began reminiscing on all the good times Nick and I shared throughout our life together. Knowing that those times are long gone, and there's nothing I can do about it, I decided I had to do something to get through this time in my life.
Clearly the site of my apartment was triggering these emotions. It's a big unorganized mess right now. So I dove in and rearranged some furniture. And let me tell you, moving a queen sized bed and a desk by myself was hard work! And it's over 30 Celsius (feels like 40!) outside right now (which is really weird for this time of year)! But it made me feel better.
And so I decided that my apartment needs a complete makeover.
But like I always do, I started thinking and looking even deeper into my problems. Not only is my apartment a mess, but my life is a big mess, too.
There are so many things in my life that have been making me unhappy for so long that I got used to it and it just became the norm. Like my weight gain, and my not so pretty wardrobe. I've been slacking in the parenting department, too. And I never go out with my friends any more. Not to mention, my finances are a disaster!
That is why I decided I need a complete life makeover.
Now, some people are probably thinking "Don't take on too much!" Which is good advice, but I know myself pretty well now and if I don't keep myself busy I will fall into a horrible, deep depression. Which is kind of how my life got into such a big mess in the first place! I haven't had a job or been in school for almost a year now. Being a stay at home mom has never felt right for me, either. And besides, it's just me and Sid now. I might as well pay a little more attention to myself!
And so I looked through all of the different areas of my life and chose 6 that really needed some attention.
Those 6 areas are:
- Relationships with friends and family
Each month I will write out one goal for each area of my life that needs work. I'll aim to achieve those goals of course, but I know that sometimes things just can't get done. In which case, that goal can get bumped into the next month or maybe I'll try something different and get back to it later. That happens sometimes, you feel like you're ready to do something and then later on realize you weren't.
For the rest of September my goals are:
1. Health: Pick up exercise bike from my aunt's house and go on it for 15 minutes a day. Not a long time, but enough time to get me started. Any longer than that and I might not even bother!
2. Parenthood: Work on our evening routine. You know, supper, tidy up, bath time, story, bed, etc.
3. Relationships: Start making plans with friends again.
4. Home: Rearrange furniture and organize belongings in bedroom and living room.
5. Money: Send out resumes for a part time job, for no more than 12 hours a week (I don't want to exhaust myself). Pretty sure I will need all the money I can get at this point! AND work out a monthly budget to help keep spending under control.
6. School: School is just on here so it doesn't get neglected. Basically, show up every day on time, hand in homework on time.
That's my plan for the next 20 days. If everything goes over smoothly, hopefully I will have built a few new good habits and accomplished some stuff, and can add 6 more goals for October!
What areas could you work on in your life?